Daughter of the Sun
Journal
Friday, May 19, 2005
I just had one of the most awful experiences of my life. I was driving up to Maine for ECB's graduation. I was on I95 going north. Right before the exit that I was supposed to get off on, three deer just trotted out onto the highway in front of the van. (I borrowed SMB's van because I was going to help ECB bring her things back down from college.) There was nothing I could do except hit one of them. It was that or swerve into the truck on my right and probably kill myself. I ran headlong into the mother deer. It looked like they were a family. The father, mother and baby. I'm not sure I didn't hit the baby as well. Now I know what they mean by a deer trapped in the headlights because they just trotted out in front of the van, stopped and just stood there in front of the van. I hit the deer so hard that it was lifted off of the ground and it smashed into the grill. Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, I ran over it.
But I couldn't even stop because there were cars behind me. I had to keep driving. I could hardly see in front of me because I was crying and my vision was blurred from the tears.
It was so awful. I keep seeing that scene over and over in my mind. I'm sure I'll dream about it tonight.
I'm going to take a hot bath and try to relax a bit.
The van is really messed up. I had to call SMB and tell him about it. "Is it going to mess up your insurance?" I asked. "I don't have collision insurance," he said. I think the radiator is busted. When I got to the motel, I looked at the front of the van. The front is totally smashed. The hood is bent, there's smoke coming out of it and there's green liquid coming out of the bottom. It doesn't look good. It definitely won't make it back to New York in this condition. So tomorrow morning I have to find an auto repair place that can fix it in two days because I have to drive back down on Sunday.
More soon...
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